Finding Joy and Happiness Through Gratitude
Close your eyes and picture your dream day. Where are you? What do you see? Who are you with? What are you doing?
For some of us, it could be a beach vacation, and for others, it could be your wedding day or the day you land your dream job. We all have things that excite us and have us dreaming of the one-days and some days, which gives us something to look forward to. These days motivate us to go after our dreams, pursue our passions, and step out of our comfort zones in a huge leap of faith – these days are pretty significant, important and they matter. But so do the days in-between.
As John Lennon once said, “life is what happens when you’re busy making plans.” The problem, however, is that sometimes we become so focused on the big moments in our lives that we forget to find beauty in the here and now. We start planning our next vacation while we’re still on our first, say things like “I’ll be happy when ____ (I get the promotion/we’re out of the toddler stage/the weekend gets here),” and we base our worth on external factors.
I remember being so overwhelmed and tired while I was doing my master’s. I knew that one day when I was finally done, I’d feel so accomplished and proud of myself – but I needed something to focus on at the moment. Because while these big moments in life are exciting and fun, they can feel so far away, especially when we’re in the thick of it. When things were tough I would stop what I was doing and count the things I was grateful for. From something little and mundane to the fact I even had the opportunity to further my education in general.
There’s this old expression that goes, “where attention goes, energy flows,” which essentially just means that you create more of what you focus on. When you show up to a party with the mindset that you’re going to have an awful time, your brain will look for confirmations. You may be more likely to find the music too loud or to get hung up on the fact they didn’t have ice for your drinks. But, if you were to show up with the mindset that you were excited to have a good time with the people you care about, you’d likely focus more on the good times with your friends and family. Of course, this isn’t some magical trick that makes everything 100% better, but intentionally focusing on the good in your life basically has your brain on the lookout to find more.
Showing gratitude/giving thanks for the things in your life is the same idea. We can easily get focused on the things that we don’t have or begin to take the things we do have for granted. Actively focusing on the things you’re grateful for tells your brain that is what you want it to look for, so it will help you focus on more things to be grateful for, even if it’s small.
By focusing on the things we’re grateful for, we can start romanticizing our day-to-day activities. To find beauty in having a bubble bath on a Tuesday evening, treating yourself to a delicious ice cream cone on a hot day, taking a walk through the park, catching up with an old friend. Go into each day with the understanding, belief and excitement that the best day could be on its way.